It's the festive season of the year again, and the family has gathered for one big fancy affair. Wedged between uncle Lou and cousin Dean, you realize that family dinners are tricky. Keeping your elbows from knocking, trying to get a mouthful of the scrumptious meal, and making a meaningful conversation at the same time can be difficult. The table setting has misled you to take a few sips from uncle Lou's glass. All you can be thankful for is that no one saw, and his dentures didn't slip in.
Neatness Isn't Your Forte
All your life you've been presenting work that doesn't look very neat; your lines tend to droop as you reach the right side of the page. If you've ever attempted to write with a fountain pen, you very well know what a nightmare it could turn into. Not only is everything smudged, your hand is a mess too. Let's not forget the discomfort of writing while having your wristwatch on! Writing can get so dreary, that many left-handers choose to indite things in a printed medium only!
Treachery of Tools to Ungodliness of Gadgets
From scissors to can openers, allegedly simple tools have never been kind enough to you. Craft in school was a session of you struggling with a pair of right-handed scissors, the ice cream scooper seems to deny you the perfect bowl of ice cream, and a simple knife with its blade on the wrong side just won't let you cut out perfect slices. A computer mouse and keyboard, handy-cams, gaming controllers, tabs, etc... all have been made in favor of the right-handed (boo-hoo).
All Mugs Hate You
As if the world wasn't an unfair place enough, that people went ahead to create mugs biased towards right-handed people! Just because you hold your cup with your left hand, doesn't mean that the world doesn't get to read the cool quote on your coffee mug as you get your daily dose of caffeine. Don't even get us started on the measuring cups; switching the jug to your right hand just so you could see the markings on it is so not fair.
High school and the troubled teens are a difficult phase, and being a southpaw sure didn't help matters much! If suffering through math class wasn't enough, those wretched right-handed desks sure made it a lot more uncomfortable. Throw in a spiral-bound notebook or a binder we used in school. It definitely brings back the horrid memory of having to fit your hand between the rings just so you could write (ouch!)..
If you lack the suave to play Bridge or even Uno, you're definitely not to be blamed. We wonder whether it ever occurred to the makers that a sizable number of users of these cards are left-handed. Printing the number only on the left side of the card, even though there is ample space for the number to be printed on the right side as well, just for the convenience of right-handed people, is downright appalling!
Left-handed people are more creative, have greater analytical ability, and have better chances of excelling at sports than regular right-handed folks. May be that's why there might be a worldwide conspiracy to keep their greatness at check, by making it a hell lot more difficult for them to find the right equipment. Left-handed guitars, hockey sticks, golf clubs, baseball gloves - best of luck finding them with any ease!
This hand... no that... no wait, I think it's this one; following social norms can be a bit tricky. When you meet someone, you're expected to give them a firm handshake. There's just one glitch - you're expected to use your right hand. Getting this maneuver right takes a bit of practice and a few goof-ups. High-fiving your buddy is not an easy task for a novice left-handed high-fiver. It requires practice, practice, and more practice.
Dying Younger Than Righties
Life has been unfair to lefties and so has death. Studies suggest that left-handed individuals are likely to die earlier, as they are more susceptible to accidents (again, thank you world). Another sad news is that, left-handed people are more prone to suffer from allergies, dyslexia, insomnia, migraines, and alcoholism (could you blame us?).
Facing Social Brunt
It is one thing to respond to 'oh, you're a lefty', to almost everyone we meet. Over time, you have learned to live with nicknames like 'southpaw', 'buck fisted' or even 'left kelly'. But it is depressing to know that, even today, in many parts of the world, using you left hand for basic things like writing or eating are considered rude or even bad luck. Many children all around the world are forced to use their right hand instead. Really!
Lefties, for ages, have learned not only to survive, but to thrive in a world made for right-handed people. We've taken the common problems faced by every left-handed person in our daily lives and turned them around, maybe because we're better at multitasking (thanks to the ability to use both our hands), more creative, have an amazing 3D perception, and better underwater vision. In short, lefties rock, and haters are gonna hate!